Wednesday, 4 November 2015

The First Key Step Toward Resolving Conflict

The First Key Step Toward Resolving Conflict
 
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The First Key Step Toward Resolving Conflict
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By Rick Warren — Nov 4, 2015
 
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“Why do you notice the little piece of dust in your friend’s eye, but you don’t notice the big piece of wood in your own eye? First, take the wood out of your own eye. Then you will see clearly to take the dust out of your friend’s eye.” (Matthew 7:3, 5b NCV)

One of the most important life skills that you have to learn is conflict resolution. If you don’t, you’re going to spend a lot of your life miserable, because we’re imperfect people, and we have conflict almost every day of our lives.

If you want to resolve conflict, you’re going to have to make the first move. That means you’re going to have to ask for God’s help, because it takes courage to approach someone you are in conflict with and tell that person you want to sit down and work it out.

Then, you don’t start with what the other person has done wrong. You don’t start with a bunch of accusations or ways that you’ve been hurt. You start with what’s your fault.

The conflict may be 99.99 percent their fault. But you can always find something to confess! Maybe it was your poor response, even if it came out of defensiveness. Maybe it was your attitude. Maybe it was the way you walked away.

You have weaknesses in your life that others see clearly but you’ve never seen. Those are your blind spots. You have weaknesses you’re clueless about. That’s why you need to come to conflict resolution with a humble heart and begin with your own faults.

Jesus said, “Why do you notice the little piece of dust in your friend’s eye, but you don’t notice the big piece of wood in your own eye? First, take the wood out of your own eye. Then you will see clearly to take the dust out of your friend’s eye” (Matthew 7:3, 5b NCV).

He’s saying you need to confess your part of the conflict first. What’s the piece of wood in your eye that is keeping you from seeing the situation clearly? Don’t start with the other person and all the ways they’ve hurt you until you’ve confessed your part of the conflict first.

Did you cause conflict by being insensitive? Or were you overly sensitive? Did you not show compassion for the person who was hurting? Were you being over demanding? What are your blind spots? Once you figure them out and confess them, you’ll be ready for the next step in conflict resolution.

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Talk It Over

  • What keeps us from seeing our own sin clearly?
  • How do you think it affects the other person when you start conflict resolution with confession rather than accusations?
  • How will you move forward with resolving a conflict in your life? How will you make the first move?

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Series Summary

Message 1: It Depends Who You Depend On
Message 2: ​​​​How God Blesses Broken Hearts
Message 3: ​​​​The Strength of Gentleness
Message 4: ​​​You​r Ministry of Mercy
Message 5: ​How To Reconcile a Relationship
Message 6: ​Handling Opposition To Your Faith

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This devotional is based on the current Daily Hope radio series at rickwarren.org.

Rick Warren has helped people live with hope and on purpose for more than 40 years. He’s the founding pastor of Saddleback Church in Southern California and author of several books, including "The Purpose Driven Church" and "The Purpose Driven Life," read by more than 100 million people in 137 languages. He created the PEACE Plan (plant churches of reconciliation, equip servant leaders, assist the poor, care for the sick, educate the next generation), which is used by churches in 196 countries. His radio teaching and daily devotional, Daily Hope, is offered across America.

This devotional © 2015 by Rick Warren. All rights reserved. Used by permission.

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